The Perfect Donor

"The companies tell you ‘these aren’t your children. You’re just lending your DNA. And now it’s been a few years [since my donations]. And I used to say ‘those aren’t my kids.’ But now, I know that there are babies out there from my donations, and I wonder about them and I wonder about the families that they’re with."

"I think children, and having children, and creating a family is such an amazing experience, that anybody who would be willing to go through those lengths, and that amount of money, to have a child--I want to help them. I mean, that’s amazing. I had two parents who really didn’t want me, and for somebody to be fighting so hard, it felt so good to know I could do that. But at the same time it’s scary."

"The first time I donated was a place in San Francisco and they told me the intended parents wrote me a letter and that made it worthwhile. She wrote her 8 year old daughter died in a train accident, her [sic] and husband couldn’t get pregnant again and then they basically chose me as their egg donor. At first I was like 'yeah, I’m just gonna be an egg donor.' But when I read that letter I’m like 'wow. I’m really impacting someone’s life.'"

"When it comes down to the nitty gritty of it, it's financial incentives. If it were for a friend or family, you know, I would absolutely do it and not ask for a dollar. But since it is for perfect strangers, and it’s an uncomfortable process to go through, not to mention a very risky procedure, making 8-10 grand is a big incentive, especially in such a short period of time."

"From the intended parents, I felt very appreciated by them. I felt very loved by them. From the egg donor agency, for the most part, I felt like they cared. From the doctor, I definitely felt like I was a number to them. I definitely felt like I was just my eggs. And because the quality of my eggs were poor, I felt like I was a failure."

"We finally found the people that wanted my eggs and we were going to go and donate in New Delhi, India. Unfortunately, that was right around the time that New Delhi was passing the laws about egg donating and surrogacy against gay couples. So that threw a wrench in everything. We could do Canada; we could do Bangkok; we could do Japan. So we had to find a clinic that would be comfortable for both parties. I was excited about New Delhi, but Bangkok was a good alternative."

"I’ve heard, you know, well ‘egg donors do it for the money.’ And I was like, ‘what’? Let me clarify that for you. I’m scared of taking my own blood. Petrified of needles. But I go through that because of what’s at the end of it. And shy of some kind of Bill Gates type money, money is not it. Money is far from it. You can’t pay someone for giving them part of your body, because that’s what you’re doing."

"My previous couple they went through a very difficult time. The mom, she’d had cancer, so conceiving was out of the question for them. And they are still a very young couple, and they’ve been together a very long time, and I thought to myself, I need to make a difference for them. And I was always thinking in the back of my mind, 'wouldn’t it be neat if they actually had twins?'"

"My intended parents this cycle, they’re also from Australia. We’ve got a lot of legislation in Australia right now that makes this kind of thing difficult in Australia. They’ve been married for 25 years and have been trying with IVF for 12 and a half. In their emails they’re really sweet and lovely and I think they’re going to be nice parents. I’m really excited for them and hope this all works out."